Random pieces of advice

One of our friend who is having their first baby soon asked for some tips and advice.  So here are some random thoughts that have been bounding around in my head.  Your Mileage May Vary.,

1. Trust yourself - ultimately, you have to answer to yourself, not the expectations (perceived or real) of others.  This starts in labor and delivery with the nurses and doctors.  If something doesn't feel right to you, speak up, trust your instincts.  You'll be tired, and exhausted and overwhelmed and getting lots of advice, but  its just advice, you can take it or leave it; it may not work for you.  This also applies to the rest of this post
2. Swaddling babies is awesome.  It helps them calm down and relax.  However, Houdini was only special in that he didn't lose the natural born abilities that babies have to escape from their constraints.  Do yourself a favor and get one of these or one of these.
3. Babies really like to sleep on you.  Its awesome for both of you.  Get a comfortable chair or couch.  Try reclining it while holding something that simulates a baby.  I wouldn't have got our rocker if I tried that.  Its much to wide to use the arm rests and be comfortable.
4. Pacifiers and Binkies (also known as plugs) may not work for your baby.  Davis hated them, Alex and Evan like them when they aren't screaming.
5. Having your kids on a schedule from early on can pay off.  With Davis, we just reacted and did whatever we perceived he needed/wanted.  With Alex and Evan, they eat every 3-4 hours (we wake them up if needed) and they have active time in the day (we force them to stay awake) and they have quite time at night (no eye contact with that baby while feeding them!).  I think it has helped our sleep and stress levels a lot.
6. White noise is great.  Babies are noisy an it can help you sleep through their snorts and grunts.  
7. White noise is great.  Babies like white noise and it can provide a nice background noise for them when sleeping.
8. If you get bottles, get glass bottles.  We have both plastic and glass Born Free bottles and I much prefer the glass.  They can go on the bottom rack of your dishwasher and there are probably fewer concerns about chemicals. 
9. Our babies have a lot of gas / digestive issues.  They strain and fart and then relax.  They repeat this cycle a lot and finally relax and go to sleep.  Sometimes its best to just let them work it out.  Sometimes they need to be picked up and rocked.  Sometimes they need a binkie.  
10. Get yourself a nice carrier.  They are great for getting things done around the house while holding a little one who needs some extra calming down. We like the Mei Tai baby carriers but Kristen's dad really liked the Baby Bjorn we borrowed.  In Boston, there was a baby carriers group where you could rent them to try them out.
11. Baby Swings are great.  Motion and confinement can really help them calm down at night when you have to sleep.  Alex and Evan spend a lot of time in their swings at night when we are exhausted and they have a hard time calming themselves down.
12. If you get a baby swing that doesn't have an AC adapter, get some of these.  They are expensive, but worth it.  
13. We haven't had a lot of luck with vibrating chairs.  
14. We use the Baby Bjorn chair a lot.  With Davis, we'd plop him in the chair while we took a shower.  Easy to move around the house and bouncy.
15. Cloth diapers can be worth the investment if you have a washing machine with a sanitary cycle.  Especially if you are thinking about having two kids.  They are easy to use and clean.  However, we didn't use them with Davis past 10 months or so.  When he got mobile, they started giving him rashes since he was moving in a wet diaper at daycare a lot (they change them on a schedule instead of demand).
16. Find the cheapest place to get diapers you like and formula (if you need it).  Costco has cheap formula if you would otherwise be a member.
17. Amazon has great prices on diapers wipes and other supplies.  You can join Amazon Mom and get a free year of prime shipping (you don't get videos) and become eligble for some pretty steep discounts on baby stuff.  The subscribe and save option for diapers and wipes has saved us quite a bit of money.
18. I hate Pampers diapers.  They smell perfumed.  I much prefer Huggies which are scent free.  
19. Buy lots of stuff used.  Craiglist, consignment, garage sales, friends and parents groups can be great resources.  The Mothers of Twins Associations seem to have twice yearly sales.  They are open to the public (30 minutes after members or so) and they have lots of stuff.  There isn't a lot you need new and can save a lot of money buying used.  This is especially true for clothes, they don't wear the newborn stuff for very long and you can find lots of stuff in great shape.
20. If you can afford it, hire a house keeper to come once a week.  We have one now and it is fantastic.
21. If you are having twins and you are the one who is going to be taking pictures right after they are born, get a sharpie and write A on one side of your hand and B on the other.  Every time you switch back and forth between babies, take a picture of your hand so you know who you are taking a picture of.  It may take a little while to get to know your little guys.
22. A blog is a great way to keep track of them growing up, but it can be hard to maintain and do regularly.  However, it can also cut down on the amount of time you spend communicating and keep your whole family up to date.
23. They grow up really fast and change every week.  Take lots of pictures.  Back them up at least once a month.